I guess,
Wonder Woman can't come today as she brought you here, in front of my front
door bleeding your heart out. Maybe, she is fighting some battles within
herself too as she knows that she can't help other people when all she needs is
saving herself. Maybe, she forgets to tell you that everything will be fine and
even if she has said it, you no longer believe her the way you used to when you
were 5 years old.
Today, like any other day when Wonder Woman couldn't come along to save someone's day, they knocked on my front door, asked me some questions, and like any other day, I will say, "I don't know."
Today, like any other day when Wonder Woman couldn't come along to save someone's day, they knocked on my front door, asked me some questions, and like any other day, I will say, "I don't know."
If the next
person comes along, together with her broken heart on her hands or the past
which sticks below his shoes, I will say, “I don’t know.”
I don’t know
the way to make it through the day when Wonder Woman can’t come to save the day
and I forget the way to wear my cape all by myself. I don’t know the way to fix
the window of his heart when she just got into the house and left the door open
with the pieces of broken trust left on his porch. I don’t even know how to
trace his footsteps or smell his perfume once he left you disappointed right
after he kissed your darkness last night.
If the next
person comes along, together with countless questions about life, loss, and
grieve stitched upon his skin or embroidered beautifully along with her dress,
I will say, “I don’t know.”
I don’t know
the way to heal the wounds which couldn’t be healed with a cup of hot chocolate
or a single band-aid that I just bought to stop you from bleeding. I don’t know
the fastest way for you just to breathe when you gasp for air, drowned from the
ocean of loss and denial anchored you down below. I don’t know how to keep you
afloat and make you realize that there are still plenty of fishes in the sea
when I know that all you need is a steady shore to rest down your fear which
keeps you wide awake last night at 2 AM.
I don’t know
how to heal our wounds overnight.
But, I know
for sure that even Wonder Woman can’t come today, we’ll try to sew the cape and
we’ll wear it all by ourselves. We’ll try to fix the broken window and put the
broken glasses piece by piece and if somebody shattered it over again, we’ll
buy some extra glues and I’ll keep it save in the drawer in case you want to
put it all together, all by yourself.
We’ll learn how to swim when the hurricanes were already gone and the sea was steady once more, but if the thunder comes from the west or the east with some stronger waves, listen to the way it breaks you hard and don’t fight the coldness of the wind. Let yourself drown until you know that the depth of the ocean will no longer suffocate your lungs ever again.
We’ll learn how to swim when the hurricanes were already gone and the sea was steady once more, but if the thunder comes from the west or the east with some stronger waves, listen to the way it breaks you hard and don’t fight the coldness of the wind. Let yourself drown until you know that the depth of the ocean will no longer suffocate your lungs ever again.
“May you see nothing but forgiveness."
Wonder Woman can't come today.
She is standing in my front door and I let her in.
Jakarta, July 7 2019 | 17:57
